Always
by Impala-Dreamer
Summary: Based on Bon Jovi's song "Always"... Young Dean falls in love for the first time. Things may not work out, but she'll be on his mind...'always'... Dean x Reader. SFW. Implied sexual situations, very tame. One shot, Complete.


Dean turned the radio on and soulful power chords filled the Impala. Y/N's head whipped around, looking from the passenger window to the illuminated radio, instantly recognizing the song. Dean must have recognized it too and went to change the station. His hand moved to the dial and she caught it, shaking her head. "No way are you changing my Bon Jovi," she said.

"We do not listen to Bon Jovi in my Baby." He said, pushing his hand further to the dial.

"You said Bon Jovi rocks," Y/N pouted.

Dean held up his finger, "On occasion. I said they rock on occasion. This is not one of those occasions."

She leaned over, hands on the bench seat, and moved in close to Dean as she began to sing along with the song: "If you told me to cry for you, I could." Dean laughed and turned away, glancing out his window. They were on a stake out and supposed to be watching the house across the street. Y/N's voice cracked badly but she kept going, "If you told me to die for you, I would." Dean turned back to her and smiled, his arm was leaning against the window and his finger ran across his bottom lip. "Take a look at my face, there's no price I won't pay…" Dean's smile faded as he watched her belt out the last line, "…to say these words to you." Her eyes were closed in mock passion as she sang. The guitar solo kicked in and Y/N rocked her head along with the music, whole body swaying in time. Dean watched, mesmerized. Y/N opened her eyes and saw him starring.

She laughed, "You OK Dean?"

"Oh yeah…" he said and suddenly reached forward bringing his hands up to cup her face and pulled her in, meeting her lips with his for the first time ever. Y/N relaxed, parting her pink cherry flavored lips for him, bringing her hands up to his neck and pulling him down. He took the hint and moved forward, pushing her backwards till she was laying flat on the bench seat, his mouth never leaving hers for a second. His right hand dropped down slowly to cover her breast and she couldn't help but giggle.

Dean pulled back an inch; his breath was hot against Y/N's waiting lips. "What's so funny?" he asked, his voice was low, barely a whisper.

She smiled "Nothing. I…I've just been imagining this for so long."

He smirked, "So have I." He said and dove back in, kissing her with increased passion, he left her lips and trailed down her neck, pulling her t-shirt down to lick along Y/N's chest. She moaned, unconsciously rocking her hips up against his.

Outside a loud crash echoed through the silent neighborhood. Dean shot up instantly, his eyes flying to the house across the street. "Shit!" He grabbed the door handle and turned to look at Y/N still splayed out across the seat, slightly confused and mostly frustrated. "To be continued…" He winked and hopped out of the Impala towards the haunted house across the street.

* * *

It had been four months since that perfect first kiss, and damn it if Dean didn't get a little excited every time he heard that song. Y/N was just another hunter, molded by early tragedy and trained by the road. She was young and driven and confident and Dean lost his mind whenever she smiled at him, her eyes would sparkle and her tongue would peek out just a little from between her teeth. She was small and fragile looking but she was tough, she could take care of herself: a fact that she reminded Dean of before, during and after every hunt they went on. They saw each other every few weeks, meeting up whenever they were working near by. Dean once lied and said he was in the area, only to drive four hours just to see her. They worked little jobs, a couple hauntings, a few possessions, nothing she couldn't handle on her own, but she liked the company and Dean liked her. It was a perfect setup: they were hunting buddies who had amazing sex with no strings attached. That was supposed to be the deal, but every time Dean saw her his heart beat a little bit faster, and each time he said goodbye he held on a little longer, not wanting to let her go.

They were driving back to the motel after a quick case, Y/N relaxing next to him, her head against the window, eyes closed, drifting off to sleep. Dean smiled, his heart swelling at the sight of her, so happy to be near her. He started to hum to himself, driving down the interstate under the stars. "Now I can't sing a love song, like the way it's meant to be…" He started singing quietly to himself, not wanting to wake her. His voice was low and slow, almost a lullaby. "Well I guess I'm not that good anymore, but baby that's just me…"

Y/N's head flopped over towards him and she smiled through her sleepy haze. "Mr. Winchester, are you singing my song?"

Dean laughed and kept singing, a little louder now; "I will love you… baby… always…" He put his hand on her knee and serenaded her, "I'll be there forever and a day…always…"

Y/N lifted his hand off her knee and kissed his fingertips. Dean shuddered at the feeling. So gentle, but so sexy. She kissed him again, this time sucking his middle finger through her lips into her hot mouth. She looked up at him through thick lashes and grinned. Dean almost lost it right there. He drew his hand away and pulled the car over to the side of the road and pounced on her. They made love right there in the front seat, he couldn't wait long enough to drag her into the back.

They sat cuddled together, basking in the afterglow, Dean running his hand lazily down her bare arm. She sat up and kissed his cheek. Dean gazed into her eyes and could not stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth: "I think I'm falling in love with you Y/N."

She smiled and kissed his cheek again quickly. "I love you too Dean."

* * *

The next time the song came on the radio Dean made a decision. John was off doing something in Minnesota, and he hadn't even talked to Sam in over a year. He rode down the highway feeling a little sorry for himself and maybe a little lonely.

 _This Romeo is bleeding, but you can't see his blood…_

Dean listened to the song, picturing Y/N: her face, her smile, her lips.

 _It's nothing but some feelings that this old dog kicked up…_

He could hear her voice in his head, her crazy laugh, the noises she made in bed. He had to see her. She hadn't called and he was working a case, but he didn't care. He needed her and he needed to tell her that.

Dean pulled the car over and dialed her number.

Y/N answered in the middle of a laugh, "Dean?"

He instantly relaxed at the sound of her voice, smiling like an idiot in an empty car. "Y/N. Where are you? I need you," he said.

"What? Is everything OK? What happened?" Her voice was fast, full of concern. "No, no everything's fine. I just… I need to see you. Where are you? I'll come to you." He begged. Bon Jovi still belting his heart out through the speakers.

… _You see I've always been a fighter but without you I give up…_

"Dean, it's not really a great time…" She sounded rushed, like she was trying to get him off the phone. His heart sank.

"Please Y/N. I need you." He could almost picture her biting her lip, deciding what to do. She sighed. "OK. I'll meet you at that diner with all the pink neon. You remember? In Owasso?"

"I remember. I'm like 6 hours away. I'll meet you there."

"I'll see you for breakfast Dean." She said and hung up. His heart was bursting with excitement. He couldn't wait to see her; he started the car and peeled away, tires screeching over the sound of the radio.

… _I'll be there 'till the stars don't shine, 'till the heavens burst and the words don't rhyme…_

He was already seated and waiting for her in the diner, he had gotten the same booth they shared the last time they were there. Y/N walked through the glass door and Dean sat up straight, it was like a light shone down on her, a spotlight on his girl. She sauntered over to him and laughed. "I didn't peg you for sentimental Dean." She said, noting his choice of tables.

"Yeah, well…" He stood up and pulled her into a big hug. "I missed you." he sighed into her hair.

"Missed you too kiddo." She joked. "So what was so important?" They sat across from each other in the red plastic coated booth. The pink neon around the window glowed and cast a heavenly hue on her face. Dean gawked at her, trying to figure out how to start, how to ask the question he'd been forming on the drive over.

"So," He began. "You live around here then?"

She shook her head. "Nope. Just checkin' on a case: werewolves a few towns over."

"Why didn't you call me? I could have come help." Dean asked, concerned.

"I can handle a couple of wolves Dean." She laughed.

The waitress appeared and set down two plates of waffles in front of them. "Can I getcha anything else?"

"No, thanks." Dean answered. He smiled at Y/N, who stared down at the plates. "I uh, I ordered your favorite." He grinned.

"Thanks." Y/N said and dipped her finger in the mountain of whipped cream on top and stuck it in her mouth. "So what's up?"

Dean cleared his throat and prepared himself. This was it, now or never. "Y/N I've been driving around, feeling like crap lately and I finally realized that it's because…you're not with me. I miss you when you're not around and when you are, I'm...so happy. I…I love you Y/N, I've never said to anyone else, but I do. And I was gonna ask, I mean, I was hoping that you would…come with me. Like, be with me…permanently. Not just when we pass through the same town, ya know?" Dean's heart was going sixty miles an hour in his chest. He took a deep breath and waited for her reply.

"Dean…" Y/N looked out the window for a second and then cleared her throat, looking back at him. "Wow. I don't know what to say."  
"You just have to say yes." He said. His smile was slowly beginning to fade; this was not how he saw this going.

"I can't…I'm sorry."

Dean's eyes searched her face; she had to be joking. "But I love you. And you said you loved me. Let's just run away together. It'll be awesome."

Y/N laughed sadly. "Dean…I thought you knew what this was. This…this is just a road fling."

"A road fling!" His stomach dropped, he was confused, hurt. Why was she saying that? "No. No! You love me. We can be together, we can be great together. Give me one reason why we can't."

"Dean I'm married." She looked down at her untouched waffle.

"You're…what? Since when are you married?"

"Since right after high school."

Dean shook his head. "You never said…"  
"You never asked. Dean, I'm sorry. We got married right after graduation and it wasn't working so we split up, and then I met you, but we're trying to make it work. I'm back home with him now. I'm sorry." Y/N reached for Dean's hand but he pulled it back, shoving it in his lap. "I do love you. I just…I have to try and make this work with Paul."

"Paul? That's nice. And does Paul know who you really are? What you really do? Where does he think you go when you're running around with me?"

"He knows. I told him everything."

Dean laughed bitterly. "At least you're honest with one of us."

"I never lied to you Dean." Y/N snapped at him. "I omitted a few facts, yes, but I never lied."

Dean felt a crushing pain in his chest. It was as if her hand cut right through him and squeezed his heart until it broke. His eyes grew wet and he wiped at them angrily with his sleeve. ' _This is what I get for saying it, for falling in love,'_ he thought.

Y/N looked over at him, trying to get his attention. "Hey… it's OK. This doesn't have to be the end of us. We can still do what we're doing." She smiled.

Dean looked up at her, his green eyes glossy and hurt. "You are a cold-hearted bitch, you know that?" She sat back, shocked by his words. "Dean…"

"No. Don't Dean me… I'm done. We're done." He scooted out of the booth and threw some cash down on the table. "Waffles are on me."

Dean stormed out of the diner, kicking up dust as he ran threw the dry dirt parking lot to his car. Y/N chased after him. "Dean! Come on! Don't do this, please."

"How can you ask me that? I'm in love with you, and you're married. To some douche named Paul. I can't." Dean slammed the door and started the engine, their song playing again on it's loop inside his head. He took one last look at Y/N through the rearview mirror and drove off, angry and broken, back on the highway alone.

 _When he holds you close, when he pulls you near…_

 _When he says the words you've been needing to hear…_

 _I wish I was him, cause his words are mine…_

* * *

John called a few days later as Dean was finishing up a case in Arkansas.

"Dean… where are you?"

"Just outside of Ladelle. Why? What's up?" He asked, packing up his few belongings that were scattered around the cheap motel room.

"Got a friend in Tulsa, said a hunter was killed last night. I think it was your friend Y/N Y/L/N. Were you with her?" John asked.

Dean froze, staring at the clock on the wall. "What?"

"That's her name isn't it? The girl you've been going around with?" John kept talking even though Dean could barely respond. He watched the second hand rolling smoothly around the clock's face, unable to process what his father was telling him.

"What happened to her?" He finally managed to ask.

John sighed. "A pack of werewolves. Dean…"

Dean dropped the phone, letting it fall onto the bed. He kept watching the hands on the clock move, the minute hand slowly rocking forward, always forward, to the next tiny tick mark. His heart kept the time, beating with each tick. He knew the clock was the only thing keeping him alive, it was keeping his heart beating. It had to be, because if Y/N was really dead, how could he possibly still be alive?

 _And I know when I die you'll be on my mind…_

 _And I'll love you, always…_

* * *

Ten years or so had passed since he'd left Y/N in that diner parking lot. So many days and nights and miles had come and gone since then. How many times had he stopped and thought about her? Thought about how he'd fallen in love for the first time and had his heart broken, how he'd let anger and the angst of youth take away the first woman he'd ever loved. He should have been with her hunting those wolves. He should have gotten on his knees and begged her to be with him.

They were driving back to the bunker late that night, the Kansas sky was dark but free of clouds. Sam reached over and turned on the radio trying to break the silence with some music. Dean recognized the piano riff instantly and sighed deeply.

"Oh, sorry." Sam moved to change it, knowing how his brother felt about Bon Jovi.

Dean waved his hand over the radio. "Nah, leave it. This is a good one." He said and leaned back, falling easily into memories of Y/N.

 _Well, there ain't no luck in these loaded dice…_

 _But, baby, if you give me just one more try…_

 _We can pack up our old dreams and our old lives…_

 _We'll find a place where the sun still shines…_

Dean wiped a tear off his cheek with his fingers and took a deep breath. Sam noticed and laughed. "Dude are you crying? What's wrong?"

Dean swallowed and cleared his throat, looking away from Sam out his window. "Just thinking about a girl," he said.

 _And I will love you, baby, always…_


End file.
